Physical connection dating
Then one day I had my wisdom teeth pulled and my cheeks became grapefruits.Figuring this was not a great first-date look, I made no weekend plans.But then, what you say to a stranger you’d probably never meet?Freed from the pressure of a pending outcome—no question of a second drink, moving to a second bar, or going back to anyone’s place—I became immersed in these conversations that lasted, sometimes, for hours.Though the internet allows us to connect with people across the globe near-instantly, dating apps like Tinder prioritize showing us nearby matches, the assumption being the best date is the one we can meet up with as quickly as possible with little inconvenience.A year and a half ago, I was 23, single, and working as an engineer at the online-dating site Ok Cupid.(As a female gamer, she’s asked me not to use her name for fear of being harassed or doxed.) “Then one day they realize they love the person they’ve been talking to online.
I was drawn in by the profiles of some of these new, distant matches and messaged a few asking if they’d like to chat on the phone.That weekend I talked to a neuropsychologist from Milwaukee; a software developer from Austin, Texas; an improv instructor from Seattle; and an economics masters student from London.At first, these calls were a little awkward—what were you supposed to say to a complete stranger you’d probably never meet?Reading through them, I noticed something odd: Many of Ok Cupid’s successful users first met when they were living across the country—or the world—from each other.I read stories of couples who chatted online for months before flying from California to Georgia, Michigan to Washington, Ohio to Peru, Cyprus to Lebanon to see each other for the first time.